Tough days but getting better

It has been a sad few days realizing that Joy is gone forever. Each day it gets easier and it helps to remember all the good days we had with her. She had such a full life and gave me so much happiness. I will never forget all our trips to Bermuda, our trips to Canada or even just our trips upstate New York to run around together trying to learn how to herd sheep. Joy must have travelled more than most people! I think she had taken around 10 or more plane flights in her life.



I have been so blessed by having so many good friends to help me thru this. For many people, when they lose a pet, their grieving is brushed off by well-intentioned people. It is "just" a dog or you can get another ect ect. Or even if they are sympathetic, they cannot understand just how deep the loss is. When you work and train a dog, they become your friend, your team-mate, your family. The connection is so deep; you just understand each other. I always felt that I could read Joy's mind and she could definitely read mine.



Thank you to all my friends and family who have reached out to us.

• Dennis who sat down for hours and put together the slide show of Joy's photos. I don't know how he did it thru all his tears.


• Lisa and Tony who got us out over the weekend on nice long walks to the pub with the dogs. Keeping us from sitting around the house being sad.


• Diane G. and Ann H. who somehow knew in advance that I needed a boost. And sent me a goodie bag from Rhode Island which made me laugh on a really tough day. I don't know how Diane and I (who only see each other once every few years!) can be so in touch in an almost psychic way.


• My "new" friends, Andy and Nancy and Lian who touchingly sent us flowers to cheer us up. That was so sweet and meant alot.


• My "old" friend Eleanor who is donating a trophy at the ASSA sheltie national in memory of Joy. You are just so thoughtful.


• All my friends who have called or just written an email to sympathise and to share a memory they had of Joy. That means so much.

The dynamics of the dogs in the household has changed a little. They all seem a bit on edge and clingy. I wonder what they know and what they are feeling? Is it just a shift in the pack dynamics or is it something deeper? Or is that just me putting my feelings on them? Pax has never been apart from her mom, Joy since she was born. Yet, she seems to be the least effected. Was it is because we let her be in the room with Joy at the end?

We must have a million photos of Joy. She was so photogenic and just seemed to pose for hours. Most of them are "real" photos ( from the days before digital) and most are back in New York. I look forward to being able to go thru those photos on my next trip home to New York.

This photo was Joy on her 10th birthday. It is my most favorite photo of her in England.